July to September 2o11.
Just because I'm still ill, doesnt mean you have to feed me krill. ):
ah the lovely loopholes of lacuna.
(@Tania R) You're so unoriginal it's bordering on plagiarism.
(@doppelhanger) "I was free on the weekend and falling in love seemed like a good idea then."
it takes a bastard of practised calibre to do what you've done.
o good ooogling God. commmmmonnnnnnnnnn!
The curious case of YOUR button.
of a time when what was once magical has now become murky.
(Nadiah)I guess "yang geli hati" is the old way of saying "and the fucked up thing is!".
You say Abeer, tu hai sar se neela, I say you, YOU sarsapilla!
remember how i said i hate people who make promises and give you their word and then back out? yeah, that.
How highbrow of you, Heathcliff.
"I mean seriously la, eat a bowl of yourself"- Shalini Julia John.
bring me close, spin me fast, hold us tight. swish.
wishes it was Bombay and Holi already.
my life is incomplete without a wire fox terrier.
I need to break up with my boyfriend. Aside from the fact that he's imaginary, he gives me waaay too much drama.
My two favourite words: food fight. Followed by my one favourite word: Africa.
UGLY PIMPLE, Y U NO BE DIMPLE?
Hi, my name is Abeer and my hair has bipolar disorder.
When I was a kid, I'd read the words Lager Beer as Larger Beer. I often wondered why it didnt come in servings smaller than Larger.
All this hungama, for such little drama? Hai Rama!
Your noggin is trollin'.
IF I was a werewolf, you'd be extremely fvcked.
Wind. #thingsthatmakemyday The blowing kind, not the flatulence.
got an email from her School's Secretary saying that she wished her little daughter was as active and cheery as me! #wordsthatmakemyday
If I could, I'd dye my hair grey.
Vhere's Voldy?
I'm sorry, I dont speak Bitch. Can I interest you in Sarcasm instead?
You're a pronounced pain in the posterior.
Is fraught with frustration no more! Wheeeeeeeeeeee!
Stuffed like a sacrificial cow!
You say ola, I say pavlova.
There is a place in England called Dumfries. I wonder where the smart fries go.
you know it means something when someone vouches to be your referee.
In the mother of all ironies, I have a missing letter in my Traveller Profile.
Rum is yum, but makes you a little dum dum.
There comes a time when you need to apply greater sense.
I love you like coochikoo.
You're tutu cute.
Write light and rid me of my plight.
Wishes people would owe her hoodies.
is in Vietnamese taxis, Abigail.
Ghoosa marne wali murgi - Boxing Chicken.
Dear God, I dont care if you dont give me a DSLR. Just please snatch away from those that dont deserve it.
Whats the scene, kidney bean?
My name is Abeer, but it could have been worse. I could have been John A. Boehner. HAW.
If your heart is pure, it wont burn. #Vietnam
Hugs only come in one flavour.
General Cuddles. Major Cuddles. Lieutenant Cuddles. Wheee, the possibilities are so exciting!
'What did you have for lunch? A country?'
Whats the scene, human spleen?
A flight attendant is called a trolley dolly. Cool noh?
I'm sorry, but I reserve to the right of the opinion that men look incredibly sexy in tailored black sherwanis with white pyajamas. AWYEAH.
And yet you forget. Tomorrow I will look better, but you will still remain a tactless bitch. Savio.
And if i were to say, pa da pa da parapapa da, would you say pa pa pa da da da rap papa rap?
Nothing is hotter on a man than a vocabulary. Word.
Harp, hark and lark. The new hook, line and sinker.
Keep blogs vacant, not minds.
Shunned, so I'm sunny now.
The world makes much more sense underwater.
Eat my desi dirt re.
God bless our help and may everyone have someone as smiley as her!
Perchance. Retraction. Such goodlooking words no?
Egg crates are by far the cutest pretend chess boards.
If being a writer means having the ability to reflect, then babeh I have loads of mirrors around me.
Of phobes and philes.
You know you're an Arts student when you read a 'Sustainable Development' book cover as 'Subaltern Development'.
"O boy do I have a cylindrical shaft for you". #wordsthatmakemyday
I look better in low resolution.
"He's not a friend la. He's fish food".
Bro, you need methylphenidate bro.
I wish I could live in a crumble bubble, then take the bubble outside and crumbles disappear.
No, I dont want to play A Hole and A Pole.
Sometimes I wish I could somersault just to express my general joy.
Just saw a tooth on a necklace. Who would want to buy a tooth on a necklace? (tooth is fake, but still!)
Whine, but dont ever pine. No one's worth it.
"I wasnt that drunk." "Dude, you were asking my cat why he killed Mufasa".
Man you make such absolutist statements.
Projectile vomiting is always funny. Until it happens towards you.
"One of them asked where I killed the pink elephant to get the pants."
Oh baby you're so foxy, you have so much moxie.
Talking to you is like subjecting my brain to 3rd degree Guantanamo Bay-style torture.
When I grow up, I will educate my children through Banksy's works.
Your existence makes me happy". #wordsthatmakemyday
This year's most critical buy- a copy of books with pictures of Banksy's works. MUST DO.
Dear slightly obese people, they're called skinny jeans for a reason.
Because it is only through discord that you realise how infinitely united you are. #londonriots
Whenever I think of how bad my day has been, I take comfort from the fact that it could have been alot worse- I could have been you.
'What doesnt affect me, is invisible to me' IS the main reason why we are in a society as apathetic as ours.
Does anyone fester dreams of going to a traditional British sweet shop to buy candy, because they've read about it in Peter and Jane? No?Ok.
"Sometimes I think that the one thing I love most about being an adult is the right to buy candy whenever and wherever I want."-Ryan Gosling
Why on Earth would anyone in their minds want to have their candy sugar-free?! Thats like wanting you want lyrics without music.
Abeer, in a court of idiots, you'd be crowned the King lah!
Okay so I'm thinking of renaming myself Abeer Snugglesaurus Yusuf. Or Abeer Huggablesaurus Yusuf. Or Abeer Cuddlesaurus Yusuf. Sound good?
'You're like a Post-It. You stick around'. #wordsthatmakemyday
Dyou have a billi or a billa? #onlyinindia
vIs it a baby or a baba? #onlyinindia
I'll be the Carmen Sandiego to your Waldo. Pakka promise.
Friend: "You my friend, are the only bridge between me and the desi world." #wordsthatmakemyday
Abeer, why is everyone running away from you? #shitmymumsays
Man, the brilliance that is some people's minds and generosity. Up in arms, we longer are.
Buy me a vintage typewriter and no one gets hurt.
Kutte, kaminey, har ek friend zaroori hota hai. I couldnt have said it better myself Airtel.
I dil you. Do you dil me too?
"I'm bringing Abeer. What are you bringing for entertainment?"
Remind me to remind you to not forget.
I cant wait till someone tells me something cool next, so I can reply with, 'thats cool like genda/chameli ka phools'.
I'll wear sprinkles, then wont you take a picture of me.
"Dude, you're the fucking cutest. You know that?" #thingsnuzhasays
"We have all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the power we choose to act on. That's who we really are." - S.B., HP 5 film.
I end where you begin.
Death bears a potent reminder in what you forgot far too often- the purpose of life and the mark you leave on others.
"Are you going abroad to get a new boyfriend?" #shitmyfriendssay
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get a pail, Jill stayed up, She wants to learn how to jive an' wail. #louisprima
You will one day be used by a country to wage an intellectual war. They'll fight over which country is stupider and you'll be priceless.
Word limit? More like mind limit!
Postsecret: "I didnt feel like a child then, I dont feel like an adult now".
Make Lego models, not war.
You cant spell cover without over- which practically means the death of the original.
I wish I were cast as an extra in HP only so I could wave my wand once and feel like it mattered.
Friend to me: "OMYGOD if you think he's cute, he must be really ugly".
Friend: "Know any good looking guys? Wait, why am I asking you?" #wordsthatmakemyday
I'm sorry, but I think some food accidentally got into my oil.
Happiness is only so much fun, misery is more bankable.
I wonder if it takes George Clooney a long time to pee.
I like big bread and I cannot lie. you other butters cant deny.
Way to exoticise and compound stereotypes, Outsourced series.
Was at KLCC and saw monks-taking pictures of the Twin Towers with their very own digital cameras.
why this yours/mine dichotomy?
The hair is always better on the other side.
My mum to me while I was raving about my favourite snack: "Nabati? Not better than chappati". @taniarahman @scharahap #indo
Only those who have known war know the value of peace.
(nadiah) and those who see the end of war are dead.
Your prose, not your penis, should be gorgeous.
May we all weather these terrible storms and come out from it, making decisions right for those around us.
War deserves less apathy and more memory.
If only dust bunnies were made out of clouds.
The next time you want to say dude, WTF, you can just say dude, dont be so Japanese.
You know you're in good hands when your School Secretary sends you an email saying, "Abeer, you rock!"
If you dont have a magic carpet or a flying something or the other, I'm not interested.
Read, because you must; cry, because you should; laugh, because you need to.
"She's had the romantic, she's had the intellectual, how about all that in one fine little brown package." -Manny Delgado, Modern Family.
I wish my superpower was the ability to click my heels.
Hate the calories, not the candy.
That you are only human is not a valid excuse in football. Or Indian cricket.
Seen on Facebook- "My child's first steps will be dubsteps".
The first thing I'm going to do when I get a boyfriend is to call him 'darling darling mozzarella'. #GGM @kulvinderghir
Is part of the Rupe Troupe. Are you too? #rupertgrint #hp
Hi, I'm Abeer and I'm a hoot and 3/4ths. And you are?
Insert populist statement that everyone falls head over heels in love with, then retweets till it becomes a Top Tweet.
I absolutely despise and detest discussions on diasporic discourses. And so does Dinesh.
Boring banal brain.
Proliferation of pretentious people at parties- the idiosyncrasies of our identities.
Perhaps the greatest tragedy is that you cease to be human.
Reflective of a time, a people and a nation.
Express your opinion, but never step over someone else's. Maintain it, but dont silence someone else.
Yes Mr. Bartender, a double shot of nitrous oxide.
Probably the best bag pun I've ever seen- "The Hitchiker's Bag To The Galaxy".
No, I will deny being your cousin if you insist on calling me 'cous cous'.
You, kind sir, dont have a vestige of prestige in my eyes.
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