Loving Me, Loving You

Because all of us want a 'Fix This' button.

Good Afternoon World.

Today something really big has happened to me. 

I shall tell you all about it later (not that you're going to read it, but I'd like to imagine you do).

Until then, you must listen to this song. Its a Pakistani song from what I understand but its just spectacular. My best friend recommended it to me and I completely forgot that he'd sent it to me until a while back when he was talking. And I was expecting some boring sad song, because of the title, which translates Search for Some Shelter by Shelter. Anyway, listen to it and skip-along the rest of day. 

Mr. Bernard's 5 Best

Mr. Bernard was my Music teacher while growing up in school. He left us to work somewhere else, and I've tried quite unsuccessfully to get in touch with him. The problem is that no one knows his last name. We all knew him as Mr. Bernard. Mr. Bernard's Music period was most looked forward to, because he had the piano which he would play on, and the guitar which he'd hold while sitting on the piano chair, and play. We were meant to sit on the wooden floor, after having taken our shoes off outside. Obviously the moment class ended, it was a real quandary trying to make sure we all got our exact shoes back; we had to wear white shoes back then and almost everyone bought them at Bata. I also remember loving Mr. Bernard's cupboard. In that cupboard, he'd keep stacks of music lyrics wrapped safely with a rubber band and each lesson, we'd get one, paste it in our Music book, then sing along to it. For that reason, we were required to bring glue to class. I wasn't really allowed to bring glue, because my parents thought I was too messy with it and didn't know how to use glue. They were right. Other kids were just lazy, so when we were given these lyrics, we'd have to crowd around the person who did HAVE glue and wait in line to use it. Sooner or later, the glue bottle, which was quite cheap and had a very ineffective nozzle, would start to run and spurt an excess of glue which we would then have to equally spread on the sheet. Other kids used to run out to wash their hands; because I was cool, I used to rub my hands on the floor, or my skirt. Mr. Bernard also encouraged us to draw and colour in the pages where we had lyrics, all around it, in colours and shapes we'd love. And the following week, we'd show him what we had coloured and drawn. I think it says alot that I still remember some of the music from the time and that I associate all these songs with him and his class.

Mr. Bernard, I think of you often and wonder where you are. If anyone knows where he might be, do let me know. Music class was the best. Mr. Bernard is Australian, had a Grease-ish John Travolta hairstyle back, with medium brown curls and very lovely green (or were they blue?) eyes. He used to wear funky 90s shirt, because obviously we were in the 90s and was married at the time. He was the first Caucasian man I'd ever  met in my life. And I sound like I'm talking about a missing cat.

Here are the few songs I've pasted in my Music book and still remember.

1. Shoo Fly

I used to LOVE singing this.

2. Puff the Magic Dragon

For years I was convinced that this song was in fact called Puffy the Magic Dragon, and that it was by the Beatles. So much so I was pissed that nowhere could I find them singing it. Obviously I know now better.

3. Scarborough Fair

4. Lemon Tree

This, was extremely popular back then and we were ALL singing it. So it was only fair that Mr. Bernard get us to sing-along to it.

5. A Beatles song I don't remember, so I'm subsituting it with Cat Stevens.



I love this song. It's for the eternal optimist.

6. Oh My Darling Clementine



I loved loved loved this song. It was also a very bad habit of mine to look at other people singing in class the moment we got into the thick of songs. I loved seeing everyone come together in harmony to sing songs, all in one voice. Good times, I wish you were in the present, not just a shadow of the past.

Mama O Mama

. While in a conversation about personalities.

Ma: Abeer, you're a geek. You know, a geek.
Me: (surprised at the fact that Mama knows such a hip word) Do you even know what a geek is?
Ma: Yeah, its some kind of animal that changes its colour over and over again. Or something like that. I dont know.

She meant gecko and she was confusing it with chameleon.

. It is a habit of mine to strangle my mum playfully, and sometimes not-so-playfully. So one day, right before napping, we were playing 'Lets Kill Mama'.

Ma: Abeer, I think I have oesophagus. You strangling me has given me oesophagus.
Me: Do you even know what an oesophagus is?
Ma: Yeah, its a disease.

The Facebook/Monash Equation

i have seen 6 semesters come and go. 

as such, i deem myself a valid authority to comment on a most peculiar trend i have seen over the last 3 years- the heavy involvement of Monash students on the popular social networking site, Facebook. this is how everything progresses chronologically:

. Week 6- some nerd deems it necessary to press the Panic button pre-emptively by writing out a status that looks more or less like this:

"OMG. 7 more WEEKS till EXAMS. MAJOR STRESSSSSSSSS!!" 

People then usually respond saying, "Hoi, we still have assignments to do lah. Worry about that later".

. Week 8-9- some other nerds/Samaritans discover that the exam timetable is out and proceed to informing everybody about it. They're usually in Engineering, and more often than not, they publish their dates as well.

"HOMG. Exam timetable is out."

2 minutes later:

"HOMG. Exam timetable is out. Worst timetable EVER. I have GNC on the 12th, ANC on the 13 and PNC and GMC on the 14th! Die Monash. I hate you!"

Obviously such freakazoids send us reeling to the WES site too, and soon, EVERYONE's status is no longer synochrised to what opinion THEY have on last night's Man U versus ________ game; instead they're ALL about the exam timetable.

The more carefree and lucky obviously have statuses that look like this:

"WOOHOO. Done on the 14th! [insert Malaysian/Thai beach name], here I commmmmme!"

The more carefree and lucky International students have statuses that look like this:

"WOOHOO. Done on the 14th! Just need to get this shit over and done with and then HOME! 

Here I Commmmmmme!"

. as exams loom closer and closer, more status updates are dedicated to time management/stress and a plethora of other issues:

"MONASH, WHY YOU NO LET ME BRING MY HOT DRINK INTO LIBRARY? 

I NEEDS MY HOT DRINK. HOW ELSE WILL I STUDIES AND GETS Cs?"

"[insert tagged people's names] do ANY of you guys have the lecture notes and slides for MKW10393? 

I need them ASAP. THANKS!"

"Can the people sitting next to me IN THE LIBRARY please BE QUIET? 

I'm trying to [11th hour] study! 

Honestly it's a library, not a FISH MARKET!"

"Best of luck to ALL of Us. WE. CAN. DO. IT." 

(yeah, a FB status is totally going to help)

"Wasted my entire day doing [insert mundane activities like combing hair, FBing, filing nails, FBing, reorganising closet based on rainbow order, FBing] AND NOW IM SO BEHIND. )))))))':"

"I seriously CANNOT wait to get over and done with Exams. TANJUNG MALIM HERE I COME!"

. SWOT VAC:


Some smarty pants at Monash Australia decides to create an FB-wide event titled, 'Semester 1/2 Exam'. Some even smartier pants decide to be too school for cool, and click 'Not Attending'. Very funny guys. Unless you're in the Arts (because yknow, we dont REALLY have exams necessarily). 


Some other copycats come up with a 'After Exam Party'. Everyone clicks 'Attending', acting all excited about the upcoming party, talking smack about booze and babes, but nothing ever materialises. 


All of a sudden, everyone's using Facebook regularly- for the same reasons of course. Procastination.


There's always an upside and a downside of having a birthday during these times. The upside is- you know you'll get tons and tons of FB messages wishing you on your Birthday and more often than not, the well-wishers "would like to wish you a very Happy Birthday. Hope you can still party it up despite/after/before the exams. All the best on the exams too!" 
The downside is double-fold. 
A. They wish you a Happy Birthday and then also mention the word 'exam' in the same sentence.
B. No one ever gets you presents or throws you a birthday bash, citing studies as a reason. 


Obviously more statuses about exams come on, but thats not so important. More importantly, pictorial evidence makes an appearance. Suddenly:
a. Pictures of students 'studying' in the library get uploaded. Of these there are 3 types:
. the ones that got caught actually studying and not giving a damn about who's taking a picture, looking ultra-serious.
. the ones where people are posing, unashamedly, unabashedly in various parts of the Library.
. the ones where people are 'mock studying' with heavy books and predictable facial expressions [and captions] like 'ZZZzzzz.', the 'sexy professor look', etc etc.


b. Pictures from the Internet. Of these there are 2 kinds:
. inspirational quotes.
. funny random time-pass images.


You should notice at this point of time none of the girls will ever look good in the photos. Jus' saying.


FB Wall to Wall conversations are also dramatically altered. They either revolve around when Person A is coming to meet Gang B to 'camp' in the Library and group study, where they're just going to get together and make a racket really, after which they'll order Dominos/McDs, OR 'HOW MUCH HAVE YOU DONE? OMG I'm SO BEHIND. I totally wasted my time..." thereafter proceeding to rant about the day's activities that have deemed studies unsolvable.


The final countdown begins and as exams are just 2-3 days behind, students get the kick.
Some have statuses like this:

"12 days to go."

Others,

"Okay guys, I'm deleting my Facebook. Anything important call me on 012.xxx.xx.xx. KTHXBAI!"
[Chances are, they'll be back on within 3 days]

The fresh Snarky graduates:

"So glad I dont have to sit for any more exams! All the best to the others!"

The fresh Nice graduates:

"Best of Luck you guys! Just a little more and you'll be done."

Addicts:

"COFFEE. NEED MORE."

Library Campers:

"WHY THERE NO SPACE!"

Lastly, during exams:

"One down, 3 to go."

After:
Doesn't matter. 

. After 3 years of studying in Monash Sunway, this only recently occurred to me. We dont have a single pay phone in the Entire University!

Mama O Mama

Okay, its official.

I will never ever again in my life try to get Mama to understand a Knock Knock joke.

I love KK jokes and have recently been treated to an excess of them. 

This is one I love ALOT. It goes:

. Knock Knock

. Who's there?

. Hutch.

. Hutch who?

. Bless you!

Funny and straightforward right? Not for my mum. Actually the backstory to this is that she doesn't get KK jokes, and doesn't understand that those exact words, like 'Who's there?' and '_____ who?' need to be said.

Following is what transpired while I was trying to teach her.

Attempt 1:

A: Okay, ma, you know how to do knock knock jokes right?

Ma: Yeah yeah. Okay, lets do it.

A: Okay. Knock knock.

Ma: Who's there?

A: Hutch.

Ma: Dog!

A:HAIN? What dog?

Ma: You're talking about the Hutch dog right? That's why I said it before you could say it. 

For those you don't know, Hutch is a telecommunications' network in India. It now goes by the name of Vodafone, but used to be Hutch, and prior to that, Orange. It's stellar ad campaigns got a lot of attention (and still do) because it featured a dog, a pug to be exact.

This first video is the full length ad when it was first introduced, which was mid-2000s, so excuse the visual quality. Soon after, shorter features were aired with other kids, one of them being this second video (which I personally think is brilliant). You can watch ALL the others on Youtube by clicking Related Links, but the fact of the matter is, that's the first thing Mama thought I meant. So Attempt Number 1- FAIL.

Attempt 2:

A: Knock knock.

Ma: Why do I have to say who's there when you're right in front of me?

Attempt Number 2- FAIL.

Attempt 3:

A: Knock knock.

Ma: Who's there?

A: Hutch.

Ma: Whoat is Hutch.

A: OMGOOOOOOD. Mama you're meant to ask Hutch Who. Not What is Hutch.

Ma: Okay okay, we'll try again.

Attempt Number 3- FAIL.

Attempt 4:

A: Knock knock.

Ma: Who's there?

A: Hutch.

Ma: Who is Hutch?

A: NO MA! Not Who is Hutch? HUTCH WHO.

Ma: But its right grammatically right? Who is Hutch IS Hutch Who.

A: YEAH BUT YOU NEED TO ASK IT THAT SPECIFIC WAY.

Ma: This is stupid. I dont want to play this anymore. Its not even funny.

Attempt Number 4- FAIL.

Attempt 5:

A: Knock knock.

Ma: Who's there?

A: Hutch.

Ma: Hutch is Who?

A: [cries tears of exasperation] 

I have never in my life had to wait SO long to deliver a punchline. So I told her, one last time. Just copy me. And she said okay.

Attempt Number 5- FAIL.

Attempt 6:

A: Knock knock.

Ma: Who's there?

A: Hutch.

Ma: Hutch who?

A: [through manic laughter and snorts] BEEELESH YOU! [I reiterate. I pronounced it this way because the anticipation + the hilarity of it all got too much for me to bear]

Ma: What is beelesh you? Haat [move away], I have work to do.

A: [after sorting myself out] Bless you. Hutch who. Atchoo. Bless you. Bless you.

Ma: O. That's not funny. That's lame.

Breaking News!

I simply must tell you that I, Abeer Yusuf, love Britspeak (the old hazy-filled-with-delightful-old-English-and-unique-words kind) and love British words.

You may now go back to whatever you were doing before this.




. I think Adibah Noor is awesome.

. I think Bersamamu is a lovely programme. Do try your best to watch it on TV3. It comes on at night.

. Chandramukhi, the Hindi version, is showing tonight. I haven't felt more blessed in days. Just imagine, Rajni Dada in Hindi. Claaaaaass BOSS!

there are a few things i'd like to say.

. my mum is going to make rocky road ice-cream. she wants small marshmallows. that is all.

. i love killing mosquitoes and have gotten very good at it manually. unfortunately to this day in my life, i have not killed that huge kind of mosquito you find everywhere. the dangerous big one. i bet it has alot of blood in it. i would like to kill that manually one day. the reason i say manually is because in india, you get this thing called a electonic mosquito swatter, that zaps and basically burns the mosquito to death. that thing is awesome because, well, its' awesome. the instructions on the swatter said, 'discard the carcasses properly'. i laughed alot at that. i love killing mosquitoes that have recently bit me. because when their blood is splayed on my hands, i feel like o yeah, it's come back where it went from. HUUUAA!

. i love telephones. i love talking on telephone, specially wireless ones. we only recently got a wireless one, about 2-3 years back, and its awesome. when i was a kid, i used to want it so bad! specially the white long-antennae ones. they were the coolest. such a sense of thrilling independence. to this day, in my 10-year old mind, its the coolest thing ever. i love talking on the telephone, spending hours talking to someone and just being on the phone. i think in the future my phone bill will be higher than my electricity bill, because what i'll save up for in not wasting electricity, i'll make up for talking on the phone. it doesn't mean i favour phone interactions more than personal, but i love talking. and phones. so its all good. i also love those old clamshell flipping, whatever-you-call-it phones. i remember when i was a kid i wanted one of those so bad, i was almost aching for it. but i never got one. so instead i substituted that with my old Genaire air-condition remote. it was black in body, and had an orange on/off button, and to access the panel of controls you had to flip the remote horizontally open, like a book cover. i spent hours talking to my imaginary friends on that. a few years back we got a York air-conditioner installed in my bedroom, and with that i got a new remote. that new remote now slides. i still talk on it.

. i love being in an air-conditioned surrounding. some air conditioners even have this cool little smell thing. i love that. i love air-conditioners.

. i finally remember the confession i had to make that didn't quite work out earlier. the confession is that when im ultra-bored, i go to people's profiles on facebook, people who's birthday it is that day, and count the number of fb wishes they have gotten. because i am ultra-bored that way.

. i love cupcakes.

My Best Friend And I

I just concluded a Skype session with my best friend, who lives about 20 minutes away from me. It was jally good and all, but some interesting tète-à-tète transpired.

So backlog. My best friend's FB profile picture was for a short period of time, this.

So now you probably think I have a bald best friend. No, I dont. 

This is what she really looks like.

Well with hair anyway.

So I saw the bald picture and I really liked it. But turned out it was just a Photoshopped thing and she was just seeing what she'd look like if she decided to go bald, a practical thought considering the temperatures we're living in at the mo are akin to that of a desert. Okay, maybe not like 40C or whatever, but we have humidity at 31C.

So anyway while I was looking at the picture, Mama snooped up behind me and thought the bald person was me. So I said no. Here's what I commented on Naina's picture. You'll get what happened.

"Dude. my mum said "Allah" when she first saw this and then she's like i thought you did this to yourself and i was like nah, its her. and she;s like are you sure? and im like DOESNT IT LOOK REAL TO YOU. and shes like yeah, but i didnt think... she'd actually do something like this. why did she do this? to which i said because she felt too hot.

and she was like o, she doesnt look bad, she looks okay but from afar she looks like a monk."

Naina replied:

"WTF MAN! go tell her i didn't do it!!!!!!! damn ruined my impression! aiyo! i have a reputation to maintain u know."

To which I replied:

"you're bald now.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA."

To which she replied:

"*sobs* you're evilllll !!!!! how can u let her think im bald now! she mus be thinking im nuts..."

To which I said:

"hahahahahahhahahahahaha.

yeah."

And then our other best friend, Su, came in and was like all, Nooo dont do it, it wont suit you and whatnot.

But I liked it. Coz I think it's cool that way.

So yadda yadda yadda, we start Skyping today and the first thing Naina tells me is "Get your mother here and show her that I'm not bald." I refused and of course,

that was that.

After the conversation ended, my mum asked me,

"Has her hair grown a little yet?" 

I replied,

"O, you didnt see? Yeah, its growing back, but VERY slowly."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

_______________________

In the same Skype conversation, Naina told me something very sweet, interrupting me too.

She said, "Abeer, I love you. You know why? Because there is no one in the entire world like you."

This is what both my best friends look like.

Arent they so awesome looking? You can visit them both.

Su's on the left, while 'Naina' is on the left.

And yes, I'm aware that the blacked out eyes don't do much, but:

a. I'm cool like that.

b. You'd still have a bit of a challenge imagining those exact pictures without the invert-ninja eyes.

And The Menu For the Night Was...

We had guests over from Bangladesh for a visit.

Below is a list of what Mama made:

. Mutton Pulao

. Butter Chicken

. Spinach-Paneer Kebab (which weren't as awesome as Al-Kabeer's by the way)

. Tandoori Fish Fillet 

. Bhindi (Okra cooked with a bit of spices)

. Kachumbaaaaar (its not with 4As obviously.A accompaniment of onions, capsicum, tomatoes lightly flavoured with chili powder and vinegar. awesome-really.)

. Coconut-Cashewnut Halwa

. Zarda (sweet flavoured rice. Very typical in UP, Uttar Pradesh (North India))

. I want 3D glasses. NAO.

Story of My Life

I know. I'm saying it again. But really. You only need to watch this short movie to know who you are, and who I am. and who who (or Hu) is. okay im being lame. but seriously, this movie is worth it. cute and a little wise, its' got a great lesson for all of us! Awareness thanks to Tim! He writes brilliant essays btw. Just make sure you have a dictionary with you while going through them. (:

Good Morning.

Have a brilliant day you.

Mama O Mama

Mama has a very bad habit of mixing names up, and creating unique names for my friends.

. Once a Lankan friend of mine came home. Her name is Ranmali. Mama called her Ranmalai. Malai, in Hindi and Urdu, refers to cream. Mama 'creamed' her name.

. Once an African friend of mine came home. His name is Wandi. Mama didn't hear his name right. She then offered him food saying, "Mandeep, take more". Later on, she expressed her concern upon having gotten the name wrong saying, "Yeah, that's what I was wondering. How can an African be called Mandeep?"

. Once a guest came home, who's name was Raheel. Mama had recently been to the cinema (with us) and watched a film called 'Fanaa'. The lead character's name was Raihan. So when Raheel introduced himself, she first mistakenly addressed him as Raihan. He then told her, 'No aunty, my name is Raheel'. Mama replies, "O, I see. So Raihan, how are you?"

. Isn't Mama awesome? My sentiments exactly.

Mama O Mama

. While on a discussion regarding unmentionables, Mama says male panties (she just means underclothes) ought to be called pantas.

. While on her way to pray, Mama catches a glimpse of Sa Re Ga Ma Pa, an Indian reality show judged by prominent Indian singers. She stands to watch an aspiring contestant sing, who's singing some pretty difficult raags, and then proceeds to ask 'is she from the Dalinder Singh team?' She meant to ask, 'is she from the Daler Mehndi team?'

. Dontcha wish your Mama was desi like mine? DONTCHA?

i just had a thought.
wouldnt it feel awesome to have a tiny little spider crawl over your legs? the kind you find in bathrooms. i bet it would feel awesome.

Why I Love Being Indian

Honestly, you couldnt possibly have a more cooler mother's brother (mamaji) than that.

i have something to express.

McDs really needs to change their drink cups. indonesian McDs use plastic drink cups. malaysian ones leak alot! 

true, its more environmentally friendly that way, but i end up loosing alot of Diet Coke by the sheer amount of sogginess of the paper cups. specially if kept overnight. and anyone who knows me knows 2 things about me:

. losing diet coke is like losing blood

. i cant finish a large diet coke in a matter of hours. i need a substantial period of time.

also, what is up with ikea charging for EVERY single thing? you know, its cool to be saving the environment and all, but when you use it as a conniving money-saving scheme and dont look to be such altruistic save-the-world-one-plastic-bag-at-a-time, it looks very fugly. its not okay when you charge for take-away containers for food we're buying from you! its basic civility that you give it for free! i understand they want to keep abusers at bay, but charging for everything is not nice. i wouldnt go so far as to say that ikea has exaggerated prices, but i have to save up if i want anything from there. shouldnt the massive amount of profit they earn cover just a tiny charge of say, a few thousand recycled paper-takeaway packages? and the premium price of 20 sens they charge for the plastic bags isnt nice either. i get encouraging the people to bring their own bags and stuff, but when you're selling a plastic bag for 20 sens, shouldnt you at least make the bags nice and durable? considering that alot of your stuff is actually pretty heavy. also! the bags used to be really cool when they were going for free, with the ikea logo and whatnot. i had streetcred back then. now, selling it for 20 BLOODY sens you dont even do so much as print your name, making me lose my streetcred AND they're not even as strong!

also, for some reason i really like saying loosing rather than losing. and loose rather than lose. because it sounds cooler.

one more thing. why is it that many girls cannot get over the fact that they have boyfriends and feel the need to inject their relationship status in every single conversational exchange they have with others? we get it. you're attached. you like that person. alot. so much so you simultaneously communicate with them on facebook and text. you just cant get enough of it. but please. spread the love of love. dont spread the love of your love. we have nutella for that.

i dont know why i just had the unbearable need to insert the word nutella there when i dont even know what kind of analogy i was making with that. 

what the WATALAPPAN is happening here?

Lucia

LUCIA from diluvio on Vimeo.

This is something I got off my best friend, who you can visit here. This is a slightly weird video, and I have no clue what the words are, except that sometimes, when I'm alone, I like to say the words Lucia, just like she does. Honestly.

Capes

I love capes.
I could spend an eternity writing about why I think they're so stylish and awesome.
I love capes.
I think they're form-fitting.
I love capes.
I think they make you look like you belong in a Sherlock Holmes mystery.
I love capes.
They're so British, and I love that.
I love capes.
I dont like the fact that every 3rd description of anything I like is awesome. I need more words.
I love capes.
They can be in bold striking colours and simply change the look of your wardrobe to something classy.
I love capes.
They're ALL so awesome that I can't post one single picture up that defines it, they all deserve to be up here.
I love capes.
That is all.

For some unknown reason, whenever anyone presses the BIZZARE! button on a blog post, I feel really cool. I dont know why that happens, but I feel awesome. Is that weird?

Dont answer that. 

Also, I cannot wait for this movie to come out. It seems very promising. I cant wait for them to finish production!

Accents Are Cool. Word.

This blog post is the result of a slew of conversations I've taken part in, wherein I've found myself constantly being heckled (playfully of course) for not being able to differentiate between my V's and my W's, pronouncing oLEives, as OOlives and much much more.

So I decided to counter the criticism by telling people why accents are cool, even Indian ones.

. It vould be no fun if ve vere to all sound the same- ve'd be generic.

Just imagine, everyone speaks in the same way. What would happen to language? How would it evolve? Sure, I'm not a fan of the chemical unity of words (take Brad Pitt's first half of the name and Angelina Jolie's second half of the name and you Brangelina), something we learnt in 8th grade, but you must admit, words like Muggle and dystopia wouldn't have come in either. We learn so much from words in other languages, specially the ancient ones. Wont it be terrible if we let it all go for the sake of pronouncing something right?

. It helps you identify where someone is from, and how much of an embarassment that place is/isn't for them.

The culture that I come from, the language you use is not seen as the language you are naturally adapted to, specially if you're an Indian who's lived in 'foreign'. You are seem as someone who's trying to pass off as what you are not, denying your roots and culture and history. To a certain miniscule extent I agree. There are many people out there who consciously make an effort to deny their roots by embracing other cultures more than whole-heartedly. There is nothing wrong in that, but it is, in my unesteemed and uneducated opinion, wrong to forget that you are, in equal parts, the living evidence of another culture as well. Again it is yet another defence if you haven't ever been exposed to your primary culture, and lived all your life espousing a secondary culture due to whatever reasons. 

And come on, you know it increases your street cred when you can correctly identify an accent, and indeed, when you get to hear a relatively new one. You wouldnt be able to do that if we all spoke the same 'clean' way.

. Lets not be such pseudo-Westerners.

Self explanatory.

. Entertainment.

You mustn't forget, that in this entire melee, it provides YOU entertainment to hark on someone's accent, see how pronounced it is, how 'weird' it is.

So people, let the Titanic sink, vith its 32 survivors, let the weedeo of it be shown, and embrace the accent that is you! 

WICKS I SAY, WICKS.

confession

I have a confession to make.

But Because Blogger Took So Long To Upload It's Text Box,

i forgot.

sorry.

Chess

It's a game I like to play.

Specially online chess. I simply love to play that.

So I've Been Thinking...

I was wondering if I should give my blog a proper conforming-sort-of blog name, instead of being all eponymous.

Therefore, in continuing the tradition of asking you, I present to you 3 options:

. Remain eponymous.
. Call the blog 'All I Need Now Is a Soundtrack'.
. Call the blog '[In] My Uneducated and Unesteemed Opinion'.
. Anything else you suggest, because I'm such a sucker for democracy.

The Story of My Life

Click here.

I also happen to love toast. I once had a 10 minute discussion on it with a Mr. Hu. 

Buttered toast is the best thing that ever happened to me.

i am, as of 12.23, insulted.

Best Black and White Song. Ever.

i tried to embed it here, but it has been disabled by request.


you mustEST watch this song. i had no clue that Awaara had such a song in it.

so brilliant my bones are aching!


Ek Do Teen!

OMG Look... It's Wei!

This is the hard work of a very good friend of mine. His name is Wei. He is awesome. Have a look at the video and you'll see why. There is another video of his that I absolutely ABSOLUTELY love. It's on Vimeo and its a little stop motion piece as well where lots of little people get a greeting mixed up. It's one of my most favourite videos ever. One day, when I grow up, I'm going to change the other person's name on that vritual greeting and change it to read Abeer, I love it that much. This video, on the other hand, is a stroke of genius. You must also watch his other videos, one of which is so popular that at the time of this posting, had 47,000 hits. Word.

OMG Look... It's Me!

 Okay you must watch this video 3 times.
Ready?



Obviously the first time round you saw me with my hat falling down. Yes. Very funny and all that.

Second time- watch the man on the furtherest right. He was our 'Pathfinder', Dr. Yeoh. He's old. Haw haw.

Third time- girl behind the man on the furtherest right. That's Lochna. She's cute. And her slippers came off!


This video was taken on the first day of our trip to Chiang Mai, Thailand. Courtesy of the Video team.

Why Banksy Is Awesome

Dont Eff With Me!

What is it with profanity becoming the order of the day?

Why is it that every Tom, Mason and Harry you see is swearing in lingo that would put a sailor to shame?

My uneducated and unesteemed opinion does not like it. Since I was a kid of 13, I was vehemently against swearing. Sure, I couldnt go 2 sentences without using the word 'bloody' or 'shit' and still cant, but I'd never use the one ubiquitous word everyone was using to describe everything! I remember one day when I was so frustrated and agitated at a flying scrap of paper that came my way, that I unceremoniously uttered the word with a very stern warning to the person who was sending the paper way to stop it. Everyone in the class stopped and one girl said, "Man, Abeer just swore. She must be really upset".

See that?

That's called value. Knowing that you're not the kind of person who swears left right and centre gives the word value for when you are actually extremely upset. 

It doesnt work so much when you use it to describe what your wet laundry felt like, what the best paella in town tastes like, how angry you are at the waitress for messing up your menu, basically all and sundry! 

Saving it and utilising it for when you're actually angry helps.

Not to mention, not using it actually pushes the creativity boundary and forces you to come up with colourful vocabulary that can better describe what you feel. + you also look like someone who puts effort into insults, which is awesome! 

Also, when that word isnt part of your dictionary, you wont find yourself using it even when you are actually upset. You will instead deviate to other words, simply because that one all-purpose word is not one you use often, or at all.

The other loss I lament is how there is almost no other word left out there to describe feelings. Everything is judged by that one word and the way you utter it. As I said earlier, its value goes down, but at the same time, no one will ever take you seriously when you use it to describe the uncontrollable amount of anger/[insert negative feeling] you are currently undergoing.

The last point is what it spells for the future (no pun intended!). When I was 12 (I honestly never thought that the day when I began a sentence with 'in my time' would come so quickly in my life), the word that would cause us to inhale our breath in class was 'stupid'. We were reprimanded quite severely by our teachers for that too, despite it being such an innocuous word. Today however, kids of 9 unflinchingly use the word like I would 'Space Jam' at my age. This isn't right. I may be a prude in suggesting this, but I believe that children should be of a certain age before they start using words which bear serious derogatory connotations. Not to mention, they need some creativity instilled in them! If this is the case today, in year 2010 of 9 year olds, just imagine what lays in store for the kids of 2015.

*Footnote: The only reason why I have refrained from using the actual word and passed it onto the reader to figure out is because it has recently come to my knowledge that I have visitors who are above 30 and 60. Wouldn't want to seem like an outright spaz to the eldery now would we? (;

Reasons Why You Shouldnt Diss Harry Potter

so i met this dude who was all, harry potter isnt literature, and it sorted of got me really agitated because he was comparing hp to lord of the rings, a piece of literature i havent read. in the person's opinion (and im paraphrasing here), harry potter is crap. here's why it's not.

1. the level of english used isnt literature.

i agree with the fact that the type of english used is quite plain and simple, but no one can say that that is what disqualifies it from being literature. firstly, HP is meant for a children's audience, and children dont have a wide-ranging vocabulary. it is another thing that it was a book and a franchise that caught on and is now equally loved by adults. if you diss the language used in HP, you diss the other classic children's authors as well- like Blyton and Dahl. are their works not considered literature? ultimately, its not about what kind of words you use. its about how well you use them, how well you weave them and as simplistically as possible, capture the imagination of a mind.

2. tolkien wrote LoR while serving as a solider in WW1, while bullets were being fired.

SO? rowling wrote the book as a penniless single mom who was pretty much at the mercy of the cafe owner, also based on her imagination. that conditions should be taken into account while writing literature are important, but again, ultimately it is the resulting piece of work that comes off it.

3. values.

unlike SO many kids' books out there, HP returns to a very old-school value that has almost vanished from our midst- the triumph of good over evil. perhaps even our children need to be trained to the world's cynical ways; maybe that's why so much of kiddie literature is deviating from the imagination to stories of real-life stuff with a bit of added personality- like the Red Bus that Can Talk or the Bag That Was a Bully. few books combine the best of 2 entities- values and imagination and blend so well to create something so unique and complete. it promotes lasting friendship, the perseverance to keep going at a relationship no matter how strained times are, companionship, loyalty, hardships, challenges, uncertainties, and the mundane life experiences, though not half as magical as at Hogwarts, to be cherished as something that one can never return again to. 

4. we grew up with it!

granted the whole line-up-at-5am to collect the first copies thing was taking it a bit too far, but we grew up with each and every book. each year there were 2 things to look forward to- how good the next book would be and how bad the next film. the excitement about the graphics, the ominous overtones in the music, the plot and where the Hoxcruxes could be, what would happen next, who would die in the next book, it was ALL so thrilling and taking. not to mention, EVERYONE was reading it, so it was a conversation starter as well. one can argue that it's a populist piece of literature, but hello, is twilight even bearable? yeah, didnt think so.

5. ron weasley

you know it. (;

dinesh, stop it.

thank you.

Dont You Just Hate It When Articles Begin With a Rhetorical Question They Want To Answer Through the Article But Fail to Do So?

Yeah,

me too.

Despite having an absolute jam-packed, stress-inducing, blood-pressure raising timetable in the next 3 weeks, I cannot help but feel excited for Thursday and Friday.
Looks like I'm not that sad after all.


titanic!

Epiphany

Judging from the kind of situations I encounter, I think it would be fair to say that I am and will be in good hands.


Dear You, I can't wait.
A.

Can You Tell Me How to Get There?

Today's letter is brought to you by A and the number uh, we'll keep that between us shall we?

In my very unesteemed and uneducated opinion,
it is not very nice to flirt publicly when you have a boyfriend everyone knows about.
No matter how terse situations between you and your partner are.

OMG.

Courtesy Miss Dee

Happy Monthasary To Us!

A whole month later, we've had 652 visitors and a fair amount of comments.

Thank you.

(:)

(p.s that's a smile, it's me smiling so much, that its smiling from both the sides!)

Okay, Who Exactly is Pressing the 'I Love You' Button for EVERY Single Post?

-.-

That's my Asian face.



Updated:

Not funny.

CWG

so imagine my surprise when nothing broke, tore, or blasted 20 minutes into the opening ceremony.

but i wasnt going to be disappointed. before long, the head honcho of the Games came over and began speaking into the mike. only the mike wasnt working properly and delayed his voice by a considerable amount. or maybe that was just our tv. i choose to believe the former.

then there was the 'h'onourable president, P. Patil, who mispronounced half of the speech (yes, i happen to be a very good looking hypocrite) and messed up orating the most crucial line of her speech, 'let the gamaes begeen'.

then of course there was the relay runner, who in breaking all sorts of civil manner, was running the final leg of the baton while chewing gum. just like an underfed indian cow, he didnt stop chewing even while handing the baton over to the Prince of Wales.

unceremonious start to the games? you bet.


on another note, nigeria gets a special mention for appointing a paraplegic contestant as their flag bearer.
most of the african nations also deserve pat on the back for keeping things cultural and dressing up in their national garb.
also, do you know that Niue is the world's first WiFi nation? the entire country has it, and its free!
Nauru, another tiny Polynesian place, is 21 square km!
Polynesian people rock, honestly.

Mr Condom

Imagine getting an e-mail entitled that.
From your lecturer.


Reason # 4355867on Why I Love Being an Arts Student.

Decision

Okay, that's it.
I'm finally decided that I need leverage in my life against all the un-coolness I encounter.

I need an ex.
That way, even though he doesnt so much as exist, I can always be like, 'O yeah, you know my ex? Completely crazy guy. Went as far as to maul a bear. Died poor thing'.

Ex-dropping is so cool. It gives you so much street cred. I need street cred. And I need to make a fictional present-boyfriend sound like the most insane being on Earth.

Also, by the time you're reading this line, you'd dare not be thinking about how sad a Being I am. I'm trying my LEVEL best to be cool here. Word.

Nu Nickname

I, Abeer Y, would like to bestow upon myself, a new nickname.


17.
For obvious reasons.
That is all.

Poem

You say Coffee,

I say Diet Coke.

You say Red Bull,

I say Diet Coke.

You say Whiskey,

I say Diet Coke.

Brilliant, isn't it? I could give W. Shakespeare a run for his money with my prose.

5oo!

We have now had a collective 5oo visitors since the time we started almost a month back (we're short of 2 days in becoming a month)!

Thank you for visiting us and keep spreading the Abeer! It's awesome.

Food!

Apple Chikaaan Quesdilla

7 Layer Dip

Baked Brie

Bruuuschetta with Tomato and Basil



Today's foodgasm brought to you by me. Yes.

The State of My State

So right now, as I type this out, I'm a 3rd year student at a "world-class" university, currently pursuing a Bachelors in Arts that is about to be over in exactly 3 weeks and 2 days.

I would like to confess to the cardinal sin I'm committing that has so become a trademark of my university- procastination. I'm meant to be working on my 3000 word OR 2500 OR 2000 OR 600 word assignment, all of which are worth 35, 50, 40, 50 and 20 percent.

But obviously im not. Im busy writing blog posts about absolutely nothing!

I could also be studying for my 3 class tests that are on in 3 weeks or
my presentation which is worth 25 % but Im better than that.

I could also study for my other 2 minor class tests but what the hell.
Im doing such a good job in wasting my life around that if there were a
medal for it, id be sure to win gold.

Over and out,

a very depressed letter a.

Epiphany!

Yes, I know I've been having a sudden overdose of these, but whatever!

I just realised, you could totally call me Abbeyaar.

It not only sounds like Abbe Yaar, the Indian-Hindi-Desi way of addressing your friend,

IT ALSO

sounds like an extended, really-long-and-drawled-out version of Abeer!

Man, arent I on a roll today!

Proposition: Reject the Silencers!

My fellow readers, comrades and colleagues.

We live in a world today that has been showered upon by the ism of democracy. We revel in the big glorious raindrops that pitter patter from this brilliant logic that was taken upon by each and every one of our forefathers. Choice, free market, liberalism, boom and more boom, the divine awesomeness (for the lack of a befitting word) that is the voice of the people has all but shown our enemies what and who reigns supreme.

We live today, my fellows, in a world of equality. Sure, some of us are more equal than others, and the naysayers say that the divide between the haves and the havenots is only increasing. But what do they know?

Alas friends they have a point. There is one particular area, where their logic and reasoning is infallible. One field where they bring up arguments that leave me and I'm sure at some point or the other, you too, stumped.

Stumped like a match-fixing cricket game gone horribly wrong.

Like you, I too lament the fact that there are scores of words in our daily speak, our squawk, our lexicon, that dole unforgivable injustices to letters. 

Why I ask you my peers, does this happen?

Have you no sympathy for the letter p in front of the words 'psychology', 'psychiatrist', 'psycho' (and many more of the like)?

Does it not hurt you when you forget that certain letters are silent in a word, you mistakenly mispronounce them, then immediately eliminate them from your tongue and lives like they're an obsolete piece of technology, akin to the 3-and-a-half floppy disks you used to love so much once upon a time?

Why is Reuters, whose main business is to deal with words, pronounced so? 

Why do we abuse letters and put them in words when we wont use them?

Why? Think about it damnit, WHY?

Thankfully, in this world where little makes sense, we have our saviours- the Indians. They and their entire people (which includes Bengalis, Pakistanis, and other brown-looking homo sapiens) never commit such unjustice- they pronounce the word Wednesday just like it's spelt, the good souls.

Therefore today my listeners, I'd like to propose a movement. A movement that will hopefully show the world how committed we, practitioners of Equality, are in being true to our word (no pun intended).

I hereby propose that we decree a Day to pronounce all the words exactly as they are spelt. A Day we reject the Silencers! A Day where we can match up to at least 1% of the Awesomeness that are the Indians.

I propose a Pronounce Properly Period!

LONG LIVE PPP!

PPP ZINDABAD,

A!

So I Had An Epiphany...

[insert intelligible philosophy that makes me look very smart in everyone's eyes]

Thank you for taking out the time to read yet another mind-boggling post by Awesome Abeer. 

"Have a good day. Bye now, bye, buh-bye now, bye.

Are they gone? You sure?"

- Barbie, Toy Story 2.

R.W.

If you were him, you'd know exactly what needs to be done.
 

 

 

 

 

 

If.

October 22nd 2010

We are stuck.

Please help us.

Pray.

Call.

Care.

Love.

Bye.

Breaking News!

That's right.

I'll be breaking out an exclusive story right here, within this space.

A story you wont get anywhere else.

I have something to tell you- I have the Midas touch.







No, really. I do.
Except while traditionally everything that Midas touched turned to gold, everyone/thing I touch gets pissed off at me.
Ask around. A friend of a friend will vouch for it.